KNB on the spectrum: top 10 tips for connecting with people who have Autism

By Beth Cooper 

KNBeings are pros at making connections. Something we love about each person in our network is they are such unique individuals. This Autism Awareness Month, we want to specifically offer our tips on deepening connections with people on the spectrum. While these tips certainly do not apply to everyone on the spectrum, they can often be helpful while interacting with people who have Autism. As always, the key to the best relationships lies in understanding how to meet people where they are.

As always, the key to the best relationships lies in understanding how to meet people where they are.

01. Routine reigns, comfort sustains

Many folks on the spectrum enjoy predictability. Try to remain consistent in your interactions. Standing meetings or plenty of time in advance to prep can potentially save a lot of stress.

02. Offer space, respect their pace.

People on the spectrum often like having some "down time" and sometimes need some alone time. Don’t take it personally! Accept this appreciation for solitude. 

03. Skip the stare, show you care.

Eye contact can be uncomfortable for people who have Autism. Don't try to force it. Some people even like to sit next to each other (rather than across from each other) while talking to take the pressure off. 

04. Lower the lights, less sensory frights.

We've all experienced an environment that feels too bright or too dark to us. It's common for people on the spectrum to be negatively affected by bright lights even more so than people who are neurotypical. If you can, lower the lights to a level that is comfortable for them.

05. Plain speech is best, put slang to rest

A fair amount of people who have Autism strongly prefer very literal communication to metaphors and idioms. In order to communicate the most effectively, omit the colloquialisms in favor of clear language.

06. Limit the ask, simplify the task.

Too many options can be overwhelming to people who are on the spectrum. Offer a few choices at a time to make decision-making easier.

07. Allow more time, patience is prime.

People on the spectrum may take longer than those who identify as neurotypical to process information. Defuse stress by making sure they know you are happy to wait quietly while they formulate a response. No rush!

08. Forget Rain Man lore; they're so much more.

You may think you are being complimentary by bringing up "superpowers" you've seen associated with savant-type characters in movies and media, but it is reductive. At best, it's a stereotype that leads to misunderstanding and unrealistic expectations. Spread the word!

09. Let their passion rise, honor what they prize.

Many people on the spectrum have a special interest they know a LOT about. Don't just tolerate it; help them celebrate it! Ask questions (if they are sharing their passion verbally) and express if you are genuinely impressed. Don't we all love feeling seen and heard?

10. Confusion’s dismissed when pictures assist.

Many people on the spectrum have a gift for visual processing, so illustrating your points with pictures and / or written instructions can be very helpful.